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“Kaleidoscope” by Ahn Yoon

2023-10-24

Na-gyeong went out to the terrace. Whenever she felt frustrated, she lit up a cigarette on the terrace with a ventilator fan turned on. She hadn’t smoked at all before the divorce, so when she lit a cigarette, she felt like she was committing a misdeed that she had not done even as a teenager. The old fan, probably installed before she moved in, had glow-in-the-dark star stickers all around the edges.

‘Who put them there? Why would anyone put glow-in-the-dark stickers on the discolored ventilator fan and not on the ceiling or windows?’

101호에 단심이 이사 온 뒤로 건물 분위기가 묘하게 달라졌다.

Ever since Dan-shim moved into unit No. 101, something in the building’s atmosphere has changed subtly.

언젠가부터 건물 앞 골목은 깨끗하게 비질이 되어 있고,

빌라 입구에 칠이 벗겨진 우편함도 선홍색 페인트로 칠해져 있었다.

맞은 편 건물 모퉁이에 있는 감나무 밑도 소란스러워졌다.

낡은 의자 몇 개가 쓸쓸하게 놓여있던 그 곳에서

단심과 숙분, 근처 어르신들이 모여 수시로 수다를 떨고 깔깔거리며 웃었다.

The street in front of the building was neatly swept and the faded and peeled mailbox in the lobby was painted in bright red. Change came to the persimmon tree across the street as well. There used to be only a few old chairs under the tree, but now Dan-shim, Suk-bun, and several other elderly residents from nearby come together at all times of the day to chat and laugh.

단심은 이따금 전을 부쳐 주변에 돌리기도 했다.

납작납작하게 썬 고구마를 깻잎에 감싼 전,

팽이버섯을 동그렇게 펼치고 그 위에 달걀을 풀어 구운 전,

꼬들꼬들한 현미밥에

청양고추를 총총 썰어 넣은 막장을 비벼 누룽지처럼 바삭하게 부친 전.

나경은 여름 동안 듣도 보도 못했던 전들을 맛보았다.

Dan-shim sometimes made jeon, savory pancakes made with different ingredients, and shared them with her neighbors. Sweet potato slices wrapped in sesame leaves, griddled enoki mushrooms and eggs, brown rice mixed with chopped spicy chili peppers and soybean paste and fried golden brown on the frying pan, and more. Na-gyeong tasted all sorts of jeon over the summer.

나경은 단심의 집에 잠시 머무는 동안

202호 미래 씨가 직접 뜬 도일리 코스터를 사용하고,

201호 현정 씨가 가져다 준 세작 녹차를 마시거나

301호 기연 씨가 출장 다녀오는 길에 사왔다는 망개떡을 먹었다.

When Na-gyeong dropped by Dan-shim’s place, she used the doily coaster crocheted by Mi-rae미래 in unit No. 202, drank the green tea given by Hyeon-jeong현정 in unit No. 201, and ate the rice cake that Ki-yeon기연 in unit No. 301 had bought on her business trip.

# Interview with literary critic Jeon So-yeong

The title “Kaleidoscope” encompasses the story’s meaning. All the characters in the story are women living alone. The main character, Na-gyeong, is a divorcee trying to live without her husband. Suk-bun and Dan-shim are old ladies living by themselves and other tenants are all single women. Instead of living in loneliness, however, these ladies choose to live together as a warm, affectionate community of women. In that respect, this story is about a world just as beautiful as the scene inside a kaleidoscope.

Although the story delves into the disintegrating personal networks of modern society through the story of Mirinae, who died alone in her apartment, the story is meaningful in that the bond among the warm-hearted neighbors and the loss they grieve together help them overcome the grim possibility of lonely death.

환풍기 날개가 빠르게 제 자리를 맴돈다.

회전하는 날개 사이로 빨려 들어가는 담배 연기를 올려다보면서

나경은 미리내, 하고 말해본다.

The fan blades whirred rapidly. Na-gyeong spoke out the name Mirinae as she stared at the cigarette smoke being sucked into the blades.

누렇게 변색된 플라스틱 환풍기 가장자리에 빼곡하게 붙어 있는

야광별 스티커를 세어본다.

서른 다섯 개, 미리내의 나이보다 두 개 많고, 나경의 나이보다 하나가 적었다.

She counted the glow-in-the-dark stickers stuck on the edges of the yellowed, plastic ventilator fan. Thirty-five. Two more than Mirinae’s age and one fewer than Na-gyeong’s.

왜 하필 여기에 붙였을까,

그 궁금증은 끝끝내 물음표로 남았다.

Why did they stick them here of all places? That curiosity was never satisfied.

Ahn Yoon (Born in Busan, 1982~ )

Debuted with fiction “Nazira, Kurman, Ekaterina”